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Dr.
Krish

Dr. Krish

July 11, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on July 11, 2026
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The Adult I Was Waiting For
There will be days when your inner child wishes there were an adult to fall back on—someone to tell you that everything will be okay. Someone to pick up the pieces when life becomes too heavy. Someone to sit beside you in silence until the storm passes. I still remember one afternoon from my childhood. My mother and I had somehow locked ourselves out of our own house. A few neighbours gathered around, trying to rescue us—perhaps by breaking open the door or finding a way to reach the latch from inside. My father was away somewhere, and this was long before mobile phones. I remember crying uncontrollably, “Papa… tumi kothay go? Papa… tumi esho…” For years afterwards, my family teased me about those words. But when I look back at it today, I don’t see a child crying because he was locked out of his house. I see a frightened little boy searching for safety. In his mind, his father wasn’t merely another adult. He was safety itself. He believed that if Papa showed up, everything would somehow become alright. As I grew older, however, I realised there were many things I could no longer fall back on my […]
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July 9, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on July 9, 2026
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The Colour of Ink
On fountain pens, love, and the stains people leave behind Built out of an old journal entry __________________________________ I sit through this lonely melancholy night with soft piano instrumentals stirring the strings of my heart, refilling my fountain pens — green, plum, chocolate brown, and black — wondering if I am dry and empty too, just like these pens. Maybe I am all empty of love… or perhaps I am simply all empty of the desire to dream anymore — to imagine a future, to make things work, to put effort into wanting someone closely, intimately, vulnerably. You see, there is something strangely poetic about fountain pens. When a pen is refilled, it begins writing in the colour of the ink poured into it. No matter what colour the pen once carried, no matter what colour it is on the outside, what truly defines it thereafter is the ink within. It writes the colour of the ink. It becomes the ink! And perhaps love works much the same way. Little by little, you begin absorbing the colour of the person you love. Their language stains your thoughts. Their habits seep into your routines. Their laughter echoes in your silences. Their […]
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July 2, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on July 2, 2026
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The end of June
It was a rainy evening. I was in the back seat of my car, returning home after a long, hectic day at work. It was the 1st of July. Earlier that afternoon, I’d made a journal entry about how eventful June had been. I was simply jotting down incidents, and I realised just how many firsts the month had brought into my life. Then, somewhere during the drive, I found myself listening to songs that I once associated with ‘N’. But something had changed. I wasn’t grieving him anymore. I was simply… cosying up to the idea of him. Love had become a pleasant nostalgia. Even without a partner, love still existed—and it no longer hurt. It felt like a memory. A safe one. One of my own making. A space that felt like a warm hug. Arms that felt like love and safety. And then my mind wandered back to something my therapist had called me a couple of months earlier… “A hopeless romantic.” We processed a great deal after that—work that, in many ways, helped me arrive at the centredness I experience today. I’ll write about that journey another day, in another blog. But for now, that memory […]
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July 2, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on July 2, 2026
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The Price of Looking Like a Doctor
“You don’t look like a doctor!” I’ve heard that quite a few times, less and less over the years… People usually mean it as an observation. Sometimes it’s a compliment. Sometimes it’s criticism disguised as curiosity.My response is usually simple, ” I know” or “I don’t want to!”Because to look like a doctor, I first have to conform to someone else’s idea of what a doctor should look like. And I’ve never been particularly good at conforming to norms. There have been days when a patient’s father has looked at me and laughed, “You look like a rockstar.”I smiled and replied, “I am a rockstar that fixes smiles.” I took that as one of the nicest compliments I’ve ever received.Why should medicine and personality be mutually exclusive? Why can’t a doctor have long hair, a beard, pierced ears, tattoos, colourful socks, or a loud laugh? Why is competence so often judged by appearance before character? But then not every interaction is pleasant, though. Once, I was about to consult a patient whom I had already been warned could be rude. As I began taking the medical history, the patient muttered one word— “Gay kahin ka!” —and walked out.Perhaps there was […]
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June 24, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on June 24, 2026
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A Different Kind of Happily Ever After ♡
A Different Kind of Happily Ever After Growing up queer is strange… For many of us, our younger years are spent in denial, confusion, bargaining, or simply trying to survive. We learn very quickly which parts of ourselves are acceptable and which parts are better hidden away. Maybe that is why ‘youth’ becomes such a prized thing in queer spaces. We are constantly reminded that attractiveness has an expiry date. That being young is valuable… desirable… and your worth is attached to your youth! For a long time, I bought into that idea too. At first, I thought staying young was important. Then, as I got older, I told myself that “staying young at heart” was what really mattered. But somewhere along the way I realised that even that definition was tied to external validation. How old do I look? Can I still party like the younger crowd? Am I still adventurous enough? Can I still blend in and belong? I was constantly seeking adventure. Or perhaps hopping from one adventure to another. One excitement to the next. There was always something to chase, somewhere to be, someone to meet, a story waiting to happen. Eventually, however, time does what […]
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June 19, 2026
Published by krrishhealthcare@gmail.com on June 19, 2026
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Too Gay to Be Bi 🩷💜💙
Yesterday, an old colleague confidently informed me that I am not bisexual! Not because they had lived my life or known my relationships, or because they had any intimate knowledge of my attractions. But because they had “met me.” Apparently, that was enough for them to know my orientation! What began as a conversation about a story I am currently writing slowly drifted towards sexuality, labels, identity, and eventually, me. Somewhere in the middle of that discussion, I mentioned that while “I am not particularly fond of labels, if I had to choose one, I identify as bisexual.” And mind you, the person also associates themselves as part of the queer community. And funnily, their response to my declaration of being Bi was immediate, “No, you’re not.” A more reasonable response could still have been — “Really?” or “I didn’t know that.” or “Tell me more.” Rather it was just a flat-out rejection of a reality I have lived with for years. And I found that fascinating… Maybe a little offensive too, but not too shocking. Just fascinating… because it reminded me of something that bisexual people often encounter, both inside and outside the LGBTQIA+ community: the assumption that other […]
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